Jogjakarta, Eternity in Time

Jogjakarta at last. Apparently, I really needed this holiday. Didn’t quite realize that my brain was fried. Conservation work does burn you out quickly, especially since most people couldn’t give a shit about it. But this isn’t a story about conservation. The entire planet can fall apart with global warming and climate change, yet Jogjakarta stands still. Serenely beautiful, offering the ancient Javanese wisdom of true acceptance. The art of accepting anything – good or bad – that befalls us in this life. Jogjakarta is wisdom…

Jogjakarta at last. Here, I can be deep in thoughts without ending up seeking for suicidal mechanisms to end my frustration. Staring at the monumental “Tugu”, I have come to understand that life is guided. Nothing can happen without the permission of God. NOTHING. Earth is only a temporary home. And if God lets us be stupid enough to destroy our only home, then God must have another plan and His plan is always… good. Even if we have to pay for it dearly, with our lives and worse… with our souls… It’s a good plan. It’s the natural law at work. None of us should try to interfere with His force. None of us should try to reverse it by trying to “save the Earth” either. Each of us should only do what we can, while we can, to the best knowledge that we know to save ourselves, spiritually that is. Then we’ll find peace, even as Earth crumbles. Jogjakarta is endless spirituality and mysticism. Jogjakarta is peace…

Jogjakarta at last. Our fates are not written on a blank page but on our hearts. A thousand lifetimes have passed in this ancient city without having to learn the science of Earth. And yet here we are the human race… We’re all still here on the paths of everyday. Here on the common human way. Here is all the stuff that God would take to build heaven. What are we so afraid of? Dying? Afraid for the future of our children? God lets them to be born on this planet and so God must have a good plan which is written on their hearts. Afraid that the human race is ending? So what? It would be nice to see Earth without any of us once again. Why are we fighting so hard? Why am I fighting so hard? Why are we so afraid? Why am I so afraid? I have no reason to be. I am destined for eternity. Not on this planet, but in an enlightened space God has prepared for me. I must believe that the Truth will be unveiled before the eyes of the world and eternity will be ours forever. For now, Jogjakarta is my eternity in time…

The Time When Perfection Was Us

My cell phone rang at 2 AM. It was a call from the past. A reminder of the time when the moon was shining brightly over the tree tops and its reflection on the water was such a beautiful sight. It was the time when perfection was us…

So that’s what today meant… A little get together after eight long years in the attempt to steal a particular time in the past that should stand still. Because today time did stand still while I wandered in the maze of ecstasy, a brief yet true moment of bliss, leaving me craving for more and paying it with my heart. Feeling beautiful and perfectly at home. Somewhere in my receding mind I remembered the time when perfection was us…

The funny thing is the only way of having true love is to realize that someday it may be lost. But the heart is obviously so persistent in believing that no one deserves such pain and torture. I stared at the clock on my cell phone. It was nearly 3 PM. The sun was no longer riding so high. It was half a day of silver pool where memory swam. It was half a day of immeasurable and soothing grace. It was half a day when distant words seemed dancing on dark walls. And at the end, I had to tell myself to get a grip. It was only half a day trying to replicate the time when perfection was us…

All and all, I just want to say thank you. For when silence resounds and years die, your mind apparently does not stop and leave me forgotten to easy twilight years. One time in the past you had driven me to choose, but today you showed me that you have actually chosen to keep the place where I once sat… You have evidently chosen not to release the fears or sorrow, nor the sweet memories of the time when perfection was us…

Sweet, Sweet Rain

Finally, pitter patter of raindrops fall melodiously from Jakarta sky… Like a song of hope, heavy showers squelch, squirt, squiggle, drizzle and drip… The rhythm is so delightful in my ears, drumming in perfect harmony, drowning out any pain, sorrow and desperation in me… Sweet, sweet rain…

Heal my heart, clean my soul and renew my faith… The rain and me make an awkward company… The surface of every drop of water are these eyes of mine… I love the rain! I love the fact that it wakes me up in an exact shape of destiny… In the night fog, in a forest of grief, it always has a way to grow happy bushes of flowers again… The sound of rain in the four corners that I’ve been writing about… It lifts up the weight of the earth on my chest and brings back the smile to my face… Until I can see where you are, until you amuse me often enough, until we grow old and die, the rain leaves no trace of what has been taken away… Sweet, sweet rain…

Let the rain kiss you and tell you that I miss you… Still pools on the sidewalk and running pools in the gutter, let the rain play a little lullaby on your roof tonight… Gazing at the clouds, so dark up above, yet the rain gives my heart a defense like the sound of the tide… Flooding a hot August night and imprisoning me in dreams again… Making me yawn while daring me to look to the future again … From the beginning to the end, this is the sound of rain that I have saved for you… Sweet, sweet rain…